STUPEFIED BY KINDNESS

The Mail Arrives After Midday
(close up of hand made paper by Mo Crow)

Wednesdays Mail

stupefied to stunned silence for several minutes--Really, I'm just typing to try to find my way through to what's bubbling inside me.  Gratitude?  Of course, blood enriching gratitude, and better than a shot of B12!

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Over the past months, my marginal economic imbalance has been a topic of conversation between me and friends, and blog friends.  I even offered up for sale some Tibetan art and art books that mean a great deal to me, in hopes of raising the necessary material wherewithal to get done what needs doing.

The art didn't sell yet, but many friends sent help, and without actually being asked directly.  Two friends paid for the three pre-operative exams (one gift took me completely by surprise as I hadn't known that this friend even knew I was in need), and another spiritual mentor who often 'waters my garden', made it possible to have enough after bills to make it through March.  Another-the long time friend I think of as my 'guardian-goose' (after the story about geese migrating--if one drops, two others do also, and stay with the wounded goose till she dies or flies) made April less constricted.  My eyes got blurry.

Today, a beautiful handmade book from my Australian artist friend arrived--sewn inside the back cover with red thread, and a note "In case of emergency pull the thread", was cash from her, and her husband the music maker.   And the final stroke was a plain business envelope with a check for the full amount the eye doctor had estimated I'd need in order to schedule a cataract lens replacement!  It just knocked me out!  This from my 'complimentary' taxman, and friend for several decades of delicious holidays with our mutual Massachusetts 'family'.  A simple yellow post-it said "Good Luck."

The shock of realizing the cumulative totality of all these gifts, all the caring that produced them got my old brain flooded with feeling and thoughts.  It has always been very difficult for me to ask for help, though when I look back, it is clear I've been helped and supported in so many ways by many, many people, and many times over.  Is that not wonderful?  So, what is my difficulty?  Nothing.  My whole life to date has rolled out through the seen and unseen ministrations of hundreds of helping hands removing boulders, smoothing the passage over rough spots.  When I look back with that inner eye, it is fair to say that every major challenge of my ordinary little life has been uplifted by the aid of one kind soul or another.  It's wonderful, and I am full of wonder tonight.

The friend I call "Archangel" calls it Grace. 
Grace arrives when you least expect it.

Thank You